... how wonderful my parents are?
I'm sure I have, but just in case ...
This weekend I loaded up the boys and headed to my mom and dad's house. Jon was out of town for a "dudes only" ski trip, and I didn't want to be alone for the whole weekend, so it was a great excuse to go home. My mom and dad were terrific, of course. They got up early (EARLY) every morning with the boys, played with them, fed us, loved on us ... It was great.
My parents have always been really good parents. They taught us right from wrong, how to behave, how to excel in school and sports, how to treat others. It seemed like they always had all four of us under control. (Well, maybe except for Kat during her senior year ... lol!) And a lot of times I feel like I have some pretty big shoes to fill. If I could only do it half as good as them, I would be happy. I'm learning more and more that this whole discipline thing is way harder than I ever thought it would be. And my little Tanner just has a mind of his own. I'm frustrated a lot of the time and can't help questioning myself ... Did I miss the boat somewhere? What am I doing wrong? Why won't he just mind me? Is it always going to be such a struggle?
More than once during my trip home, I felt so embarrassed by his behavior. I was sure that my parents were secretly cheering inside once we left.
Imagine my surprise when I received this email from my mom after arriving home:
Hi Rachel:
Just thinking what a great weekend it was with you and the kids. I feel so lucky that we can spend time with you and I already miss my little bubbies. I loved getting up with Tanner in the mornings, having him all to myself. It was our special time together and I just keep thinking how much I loved it. I know you think he doesn't behave, but he is still learning and the important things are there. He loves the people around him and cares about others. He loves to snuggle and is really very bright. He just has a mind of his own! You are doing a good job. I know it gets frustrating, but just keep letting him know you are in charge. I am still laughing thinking about some of the things he did. The little whisper "be quiet" and one you didn't see -- After I spanked him when he wouldn't get on the couch he started wiping the back of his pants with his hand. I asked him what he was doing and he said he was "wipe off the spank". It was everything Dad and I could do to keep a straight face. And you know it wasn't 5 minutes after I spanked him he came up to me and put his arms up to me and said "up". I melted. That little guy just has my heart. It just brings tears to my eyes to think I spanked him. Just like it did with you kids. I just love the boys so much, I miss them already.
The house is so quiet without the little shrieks from Landon. Dah! Dah! Dad had so much fun with him. I really enjoyed watching that. He just keeps his little self so busy and smiles all the time. He radiates happiness. I can't wait till summer when they can enjoy being here outside with so much more to do. Dad and I just felt so sad after you left that they didn' spend time out in the snow. Dad kept saying Tanner could have gone sledding and built a snowman. I know he got bored here and would have enjoyed that so much. I feel so bad he missed out on that. Next time.
Also Dad and I want you to know we can totaly handle taking care of the boys for a weekend this summer. Please consider taking a weekend to go somewhere without the kids and letting Dad and I take them. Honestly Rachel, I think you need a weekend off with your husband and no kids. We really can handle it. Dad agreed we could do it. So please think about it. Summer would probably be better when they can go outside and we can do more things with them, so would you consider it?
You are such a great Mom and I am just so happy we got to spend time with you. Give those little boys a kiss from their Grammy. I will be remembering little things they did all week. They will be behind all my smiles!.
Love and Miss you already,
MOM
I told you they were great, didn't I?
6 comments:
WOW!! I'm crying right now!
That is the sweetest thing! Are your parents all healed from the accident? Sounds like they are doing well.
Mom to Mom- You totally need to take that letter from your mom to heart because it is 110% true. You are a great mom, even when you don't think so. Life, especially with little ones, can be discouraging, but if you can step back and look at the big picture, like your mom and dad can do now that they are grandma and grandpa, your kids are turning out really great and that's because of you. All kids have bumps in the road, some bumpier and longer than others, but Tanner is a good boy at heart and he is soaking up everything that you are teaching him, just like you did with your mom and dad. I think we can all relate to your situation because we all want our kids to be on their best behavior around others, especially our parents, and somehow they not always. Your mom and dad do understand and they do know how wonderful you are. That goes for all the nonstop, hardworking moms out there. Way to go Rachel and every other mom. To the world, we might just be one person, but to your child you just might be the world. We all need to step back and look at the big picture sometimes, I know I do. Ok, ok, did I drone on for too long. Sorry! :)
Okay, now I'm crying after Sarah's comment...
I do my best! :)
What a beautiful note from your mom (and from the others!) to encourage you and remind you of what's important. She is fantastic and you need to listen to her: You are a wonderful mom.
As I've related before, my oldest gives me the biggest run for my money. He always has. What is beautiful, though, is that while still making me crazy, he is growing up and maturing and with this maturity has come a LOT more sweet moments around the house. I'm writing this, of course, in the middle of our newest phase with him, but I need to remember two weeks ago when I just couldn't get enough of him.
The fact that you are working out the best way to raise him shows that you're not just letting go. You are proactively mothering and that is SUCH a gift to him. Blessings and prayers!!!
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